MARIA CURREY|GUEST
“Why do you think God needs you to go and potentially be in harm’s way?” Even while blasting my question, in my mind, I heard myself saying, ‘This is what he has trained his entire life and career to do and be,’ yet, my protective and possessive instincts wanted to keep him home and away from any potential danger.
My husband answered me, “I know this is what God wants me to do and the way He is directing me. How about if you go and get alone with Him? Pray, and listen for what He says to you.”
A late spring day fifteen years ago that seems like yesterday, the impact no less powerful.
I slipped away, my husband more than willing to watch the kids; I thought I was taking myself for a walk, when actually, God directed my steps to a nearby lakeside bench.
I cried out audibly to God, “Father, I know in my mind that You called Craig and me to this Army life decades ago and that this is truly his calling— to be a man after your own heart serving in the military. You called me with him to be messengers of Your light and life on this military mission field. But why, at this later point in his career, does he need to go into a completely hot war zone? —when our kids are college bound, eighth grade and fifth grade? They really need their dad! Isn’t there another option?” A selfish, hot explosion of prayer flew into the air. “God, isn’t there another WAY?”
I sat there in silence, and a gentle breeze blew across the water. In the stillness, of all people, Elijah came to mind. He fled Jezebel. He hid in a cave. God’s Word came to him. “What are you doing here, Elijah?” In the same way, there was a sense of God saying, “What are you doing here, Maria?” But in this instance, unlike Elijah’s life hanging in the balance, I was concerned for my husband’s life and our future.
I didn’t answer but kept wondering and remembering Elijah’s story. As I sat on the bench by the water, thinking of Elijah standing on the mount before the LORD, the breeze blew again, swifter across the water. God didn’t speak to Elijah in the wind or even in the earthquake or fire, but in a low whisper. As God met Elijah on the mount, God met my sad bench-prayer with a low whisper of, “I AM the way and the truth and the life. No man comes to the Father except through me” (John 14:6). A low whisper into my spirit, “Maria, there are those who will see the WAY that I AM through your husband. I need him to go, to be obedient. Who are you to get in My WAY?”
A flood of tears washed my silence with a humbled knowing that my God, of Elijah’s mountainside, visited that lakeside bench with His whispering way.
In His infinite mercy, God also whispered to my spirit, “I will let you know when to pray, Maria. Trust Me.”
So, I pondered the promise of His power in John 14:6, and He breathed into me as my Director, with His Direction, and through clear Directives:
I AM
I was reminded that Jesus is the GREAT I AM—integrally intertwined as the Triune Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, Who was, and is, and is to come.
He is the I AM Director of my every way!
“The mind of a person plans his way, but the LORD directs his step”s (Proverbs 16:9, NASB).
the WAY
I was reminded that He is the WAY.
He gives Direction through the true, solid, perfected WAY of His truth-filled, life-giving Word.
“Blessed are those whose way is blameless, who walk in the law of the LORD! Blessed are those who keep His testimonies, who seek Him with their whole heart, Who also do no wrong, but walk in His ways! Oh that my ways may be steadfast in keeping Your statutes!” (Psalm 119:1-5).
The TRUTH and the LIFE
He gives Word Directives that spring from His TRUTH and LIFE.
“My soul clings to the dust; give me life according to Your word! Remember Your word to your servant, in which You have made me hope. This is my comfort in my affliction, that Your promise gives me life. Your statutes have been my songs in the house of my sojourning. I remember Your name in the night, O LORD, and keep Your law” (Psalm 119: 25, 49-50, 54-55).
God was abundantly and mercifully faithful to His promise; His Spirit let me know when to pray. During many watches of the night— my time of 3:00 am synchronized with Craig’s 9:00 am Middle Eastern time— I was awakened from sleep to pray.
One morning, poignantly alarming, I literally woke up shaking and crying, and began praying fervently. Praying aloud the Ephesians 6 armor of God over Craig, Psalm 91 as a shield over his being, crying the truth and life of God’s Word over my beloved. As abruptly as I was awakened, a peace washed my spirit, and I fell back to sleep.
The next day, Craig and I spoke on the phone as we normally did every couple of days. He spoke to our sons, and we had fun catching up. Strangely, I had forgotten and didn’t think to ask him about my prayer from the night before. That year of separation was precious in building a different kind of connection and relationship through phone, letter, and computer conversations. We made every effort to keep them upbeat and positive. My brother called shortly after to check on Craig; he was unexpectedly prompted to pray only a few days prior.
When Craig returned several months later, we recounted our year in detail; it was then that we traced my 3 am prayer and my brother’s concerns pointedly to the day Craig’s convoy, moving along a Baghdad exit ramp, was hit by an IED (improvised explosive device). The two vehicles leading that convoy were destroyed, the first with the heart-rending, tragic loss of everyone within, the second was immobilized with injuries, and the third peppered with bullets yet somehow protected, that vehicle the one in which my husband sat.
In a staff meeting later on the day of the attack, Craig shared a letter received the day before from his mother. Within the envelope was a bulletin from her church and his name was listed on their weekly prayer list for deployed service members. Many other meetings and convoys he sat through with colleagues who didn’t know Jesus as their Way, Truth, and Life. And while he doesn’t know outright whether they surrendered to His way, they witnessed a man directed in His way, His Truth, and His Life. And while I did not know whether or not my husband would return, through His whispering Spirit, I learned and lived a deeper level of trusting prayer in Him as my Way, my Truth, and my Life.
- As Director of your life, what ways is God leading? How will you respond to His directions?
- If there is a way in your life that seems insurmountable or completely crooked, what truth from John 14:6 directs you with new or renewed perspective?
- How is God calling you to yield more fully to Him as the WAY, the TRUTH, and the LIFE?
About the Author:
Maria Currey
Maria is the Women’s Ministry Director at Northeast Presbyterian Church in Columbia, South Carolina. She holds degrees in Music and English from the University of Puget Sound in Tacoma, Washington, the city that connected her heart and life with her career Army officer husband. She and Craig have been married 34 years and spent the first 25 years of their marriage traveling the world with their, now, three grown children who have blessed them with five growing grandchildren! Upon military “retirement,” they settled and stayed in Columbia to work and be near family. Maria previously served in local and international roles within Protestant Women of the Chapel (PWOC), a military women’s ministry. She served as the Assistant Director of Music at NEPC, as hand bell and orchestra director and as the pianist. Maria is the author of the Bible study Understanding Wisdom, loves to study and teach the Word, to eat great lunches and talk about Jesus with other women, to explore God’s wonders with her grandchildren, to try new delicious recipes, and to water ski!