sanctification

On Milestones, Maps, and How God Directs our Paths

ELLEN DYKAS|CONTRIBUTOR Are you a journaler? I’ve been one since age thirteen and now, ninety-two journals later, my story is there with all its dreams, foolishness, heartbreak, life-in-Christ surprises, and…HOPES! As a teen, I dreamed of writing books and traveling the world to help people. Little did I know how God’s amazing plans for me would unfold! For starters, the first two books I wrote both had some form of the word “sex” in the title…I mean, I seriously did NOT see that coming when I was thirteen years old! When my first discipleship workbook, Sexual Sanity for Women: Healing from Sexual and Relational Brokenness, was published in January 2013, I was thankful and expectant. Thankful because producing this resource had been a long, somewhat challenging process and finally, after more than three years of book “pregnancy,” the workbook was born. I waited expectantly to see the response and impact on women’s lives. One message came in on publishing day from a woman: “You do know, right, that 99% of women in the church will never engage [with] this? Most churches won’t even consider this!” Initially, I felt frustrated and angry. I didn’t want balloons and accolades—but perhaps a little encouragement and thankfulness! But GOD...

On Milestones, Maps, and How God Directs our PathsChristina Fox2023-08-15T13:36:44+00:00

The One Thing You Have to Get Right

HEATHER MOLENDYK|CONTRIBUTOR You can get a lot of things wrong in life. You can go to the wrong school. You can give the wrong gift. You can wear the wrong outfit to a business presentation. You can buy the wrong house. You can marry the wrong man. But there is one thing you absolutely cannot get wrong in life: who Jesus is and what his time on earth was all about. Who is Jesus? If you want to know who Jesus is, ask Him. He isn’t shy. “I and the Father are one,” Jesus declares in John 10:30. Jesus is God. Let that thought linger for a moment. Sit with it awhile. Jesus is God. Meditate on it. Ponder all the implications that statement carries with it. Jesus is God. Evaluate your reaction to his identity claim. Wrestle with any discomfort you may feel as the form Jesus has taken in your imagination morphs into the identity Jesus claims about Himself. Jesus is God. What was Jesus’ ministry all about? Jesus did many great things during His three-year ministry. He miraculously fed thousands of people, but those same people were hungry the next day. He healed numerous physical ailments and raised some people from the dead; however, those same people eventually died at the end of their time. If Jesus’ miracles didn’t “stick,” then what was the purpose of them? Why feed people tonight who will only need to eat again tomorrow morning? Why raise someone from the dead now when they will only die again at some future date? Again, let’s ask Jesus the “why” behind the miracles. He is transparent about them. “The works that I do in my Father’s name bear witness about me,” Jesus explains in John 10:25. The miracles are proof that Jesus is God. Jesus is God who took on the flesh of mankind to do what exactly? If the miracles aren’t the mission, if the easing of suffering is not the mission, then why, Jesus, are you here? “I am here to suffer, to be humiliated, and die,” Jesus proclaims to His followers. “I won’t stay dead. I will rise from the dead on the third day” (Matt. 16:21, Mk. 8:31, Lk. 9:22, paraphrased). Jesus is God. Jesus entered the world as a man so that He could die. Having divine power allows Jesus to fight death and rise again...

The One Thing You Have to Get RightChristina Fox2023-08-15T13:40:41+00:00

Light in the Shadowlands

JENNIFER HARRIS|GUEST In the high desert of sagebrush and wildflowers in south central Washington, one can trace the course of the sun from sunrise to sunset. From my living room window, I can see this journey as the sun performs its faithful task each morning sending anticipated rays of light over the eastern hills, breaking into darkness to declare a new day has begun. Through the course of the morning, making coffee, sending the dogs outside, lighting a candle, putting on Appalachian hymns, waking kids for school, and preparing breakfast, the view of the sun continues its ordained course over the Ahtanum Ridge to the south. Once the sun is high enough, I don’t pay much attention to its position as I hustle to and fro throughout the day. So high above little me is this hydrogen and helium star that bathes the landscape in unabashed light. As the sun dances across the ever-blue skies, shadows appear. This is where the artistry of God is on display. He paints a new canvas with contours and contrasts, a living work of art in constant motion from dawn til dusk. You don’t want to go too long throughout the day without taking a peak out the window to see what He’s come up with next on the hillside canvas. Every morning, night is transfigured with brilliance, and the shadows are reshaped by light. It is the same way in our lives; there are shadows of darkness, fear, and brokenness. But shadows inevitably prove there is a light shining somewhere. This is true in my own life...

Light in the ShadowlandsChristina Fox2023-03-24T17:23:00+00:00

New Year, New Habits

KIM BARNES|GUEST Years ago, I followed bloggers who encouraged their readers to join “The 5 O’clock club.” The aspirations of the club were to rise early (5am) to start your day. They offered a lot of advice about how to establish this habit. I don’t remember much of the advice, but one thing has stayed with me. One blogger wrote about rising at 5am: “Expect to feel bad for about 15 minutes.” That was a revolutionary idea to me. Previously, I would try to wake up early and usually felt so awful that I would decide that my body just isn’t ready to be awake and I would go back to bed. But what if it was NORMAL to feel bad? If my expectation is to feel bad, then I can soldier on. And you know what I discovered? When I wake up early and feel awful, the feeling almost always passes in about 15 minutes. Changing my expectation of what waking up should be like enabled me to establish a new routine and encouraged me to persevere. Expect the Hard As we start a new year, many of us are looking at establishing new routines and habits. One of the greatest obstacles to new habits is wrong expectations. We expect to feel a certain way. We want to gain certain results. But when reality is incongruous with those expectations, we get discouraged. We give up. We imagine that since the habits and routines that we aspire to are good, it will feel good to do them. Maybe they won’t feel good right away, because change is hard, but we expect that eventually the new habit will get easy...

New Year, New HabitsChristina Fox2023-03-24T17:45:09+00:00

Thoughts on Growing Older

LEAH FARISH|GUEST Today I had a lovely conversation with a Christian sister approaching 80—years, not mph. We had just finished Sharon Betters’ and Susan Hunt’s Aging with Grace, and that led us to our own talk on that topic. The book presents “steppingstones” of advice about getting older, and we came up with a few more. Widen your heart After a certain age, we cannot be young, but we can be youthful. The phrase “growing older” really offers a choice—between growing or just getting old. One of the things I notice about a youthful, ageless person is that she keeps growing in relationships. In existing relationships, she allows her friends to change; she lets herself be surprised; she expects her children to develop continually. She is open to new relationships, greeting newcomers at church or events, asking questions, revising first impressions with second and fifth and twentieth ones. One of the godliest, and ever-youthful, people I ever knew, my mother, was still asking the names—and birthdays and life stories-- of her ever-changing roster of caregivers when she was in her late 80’s. We would call or visit to check on her only to hear of the woes or triumphs of the third-grade child of her physical therapist. Her heart remained wide open to people all her life. Paul admonishes us; “You are restricted in your own affections…[W]iden your hearts.” (1 Cor. 6:12-13). It has become fashionable for some of us to nestle into our identity as introverts, but if we want to stay youthful, we will continue to pursue love...

Thoughts on Growing OlderChristina Fox2023-03-24T17:48:33+00:00

John 15: Abide, Wholly Dependent Yet Secure

MELISSA OSTERLOO | GUEST Relationships are powerfully influential; we begin our lives completely reliant on the love and care given to us by our parents. Secure attachment— trust built over time through consistent encounters of dependent needs being fulfilled— informed us that we were seen, safe, and valuable. Children naturally feel at home in their parents’ arms, no matter what circumstances surround them. They grow and thrive, confident that their longings will not go unnoticed. We can learn a lot from children. In John 15:1-2, Jesus describes himself as the true vine, and his Father as the vinedresser. "Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit." Over the past four years, I have been living through a tough season of pruning. My husband, Adam, and I moved to northern Alabama in March 2018 for what seemed to be a great opportunity. He had built a solid reputation in the commercial truck industry and was recruited to open a new sales territory that had great potential. However, within just 8 months, instead of reaping the rewards of hard-earned commissions, we found ourselves endorsing the back of a severance check. Just enough to get by for a couple of months, and mere weeks before Christmas. Our harvest had not been fruitful.

John 15: Abide, Wholly Dependent Yet SecureKathy Wargo2023-03-24T18:00:51+00:00

Turning the Dials at Thanksgiving

HOLLY MACKLE|CONTRIBUTOR It’s Thanksgiving and I’m in the kitchen turning dials, trying so hard to get everything just right. If only I spoke of solely the oven dial—but who can forget the relational dials, the conversational dials, the quick repentance dials, and even the simple act of dialing the number just to extend the invitation. At the holidays it seems there are far too many complex layered dials to turn and crank and adjust just so. It can be downright exhausting. My brilliant neighbor owns and operates her own medical testing lab. (STEM girl, whoop!) At the very beginning of the Covid crisis—you remember, the days when we didn’t understand the first thing about transmission—one of her employees began running a high fever. My neighbor sent her entire staff home and undertook the painstaking process of sanitizing and deep cleaning the lab all by herself. Trouble was, this wasn’t the chemistry lab from our high school recollections. My friend sanitized every piece of precision equipment, each complex apparatus with countless knobs, dials, levers, and pulls. I can still see my sweet neighbor’s face as she described the nature of what had to be done. It was all-encompassing. She had to find and scour every crevice for the protection of all involved. I’m hard-pressed to think of anything that sounds more like Jesus to me. Her actions remind me of the Christ who won’t stand for a quick wipe down of our hearts. His holiness and utter righteousness can’t give it a once over and call it a day—his beloved are at stake. For any particle of sin left on us or in us makes us unacceptable to his Father, the God of all cellular levels, protons, elements, and even viruses...

Turning the Dials at ThanksgivingChristina Fox2023-03-24T18:13:16+00:00

Why Go to Bible Study

COURTNEY DOCTOR|CONTRIBUTOR I went to my first Bible study because I was lonely. I was in my early twenties with two small children at home and was desperate to meet other women and make new friends. The offer for free child-care only sweetened the deal and I signed up, eager for a few hours away from children and hungry for adult conversation. I did not go to this study because I had a burning desire to know God or his Word. However, while I did meet new friends and benefitted from a few hours away from the demands of small children, ultimately, I met God. And I have continued to attend Bible studies ever since. If you attend a weekly Bible study of some kind—in your church, neighborhood, or community—I want to ask you why? Like me in my twenties, perhaps you attend Bible study to make friends or enjoy child-care. The reasons that compel us to walk in the door will vary from person to person and from season to season. But the bigger question I want us to consider is, Why do we go to Bible study at all? It’s an important question because the answer shapes our expectations. What should we expect to be the result of going to Bible study? I’d like to propose that, while there are a myriad of good things that happen in and through Bible study—we deepen friendships, grow in our knowledge of God’s Word, invest in the lives of those around us—one of the ultimate things that happens is transformation. If you are a Christian, God is at work in your life transforming you. He is changing you into a woman who is better able to discern his will (Rom. 12:2). He is changing you so that you will be better equipped to join him on his mission to seek and save the lost. He is transforming you so that you will be more consumed with his kingdom than with your own, with his glory than with yours. And he is changing you to be increasingly more like Jesus in every way (Rom. 8:29). One of the most remarkable things about this extra-ordinary transformation is that it happens in very ordinary ways. And “going to Bible study” is one of the ordinary means God uses to do his extraordinary work. But this transformation does not just happen automatically—it requires your participation. Two ways you can actively participate with God in your transformation is by doing your homework and by showing up to discuss it with others. DO THE HOMEWORK A lot of women I talk with think of the homework provided in their Bible study as optional or something they will be better able to prioritize in a different stage of life. But time in God’s Word is vital at every stage of life! And a good Bible study will provide you with the structure and opportunity to spend that time productively. Most Bible study homework will ask you to read a passage of Scripture, answer questions about the passage, and consider how you are to respond to what you’ve read. The actual moments you use to go through these steps can feel so ordinary. Some of you do your study early in the morning while you’re still in your pajamas. Others study over lunch while sitting at your desk. Some of you try to finish it while you’re waiting in the carpool line. Very average moments for the most part. But, as we move through the homework of our study—reading, answering questions, reflecting, and thinking about how we are to respond—God is at work! Paul wrote in 2 Timothy 3:16 that, “all Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness.” This list is not exhaustive. As you read God’s Word, he, by his Spirit, is instructing you, teaching you, convicting you, encouraging you, rebuking you, feeding you, calling you, reminding you, humbling you, lifting you, comforting you, and loving you...

Why Go to Bible StudyChristina Fox2023-03-24T18:17:35+00:00

Why Me? A New Perspective

On my way to a singles’ potluck dinner, I was reveling in the new car smell of my much loved two-week-old car. Suddenly, out of my peripheral vision, I saw a car lose control and barrel down the cross street I was passing, so I sped up to avoid being hit. After all, I had already been in three accidents—none my fault—in the last two years and finally had gotten rid of the car that seemed to be an accident magnet. “Not this car!” I thought as the car behind me was hit and then propelled into mine. Why me?!! Story break: How often do I ask that? Most of the time the circumstances are not as dramatic as a car wreck. The babysitter cancels. The gas tank is low. Traffic is backed up. The printer jams. Stop for a minute and think with me of the last time “Why me?” crossed your lips, or at least, your mind. One of my last tirades was as a just-purchased iced tea turned over onto the floor of my car. Really? That made me ask, . . . Why me?!! It was all I could think as I watched my new car be towed away like its predecessor, the last time just five months before. God, why me, again? Once the family friends who had (providentially) witnessed the wreck took me home, and I called my family and singles group to tell them what had happened, then I plopped on my bed and begrudgingly grabbed my Bible to look for some sort of understanding and comfort. I thought the Book of Job would be a good place to start, since I felt I had a lot in common with the patriarch. My Bible fell open and (for real!) my gaze fell upon Job 23:10: “But He knows the way I take; When He has tried me, I shall come forth as gold” (NASB). Though the thought of being tried by God was not in itself comforting, the words surrounding it were. “He knows.” God knew what happened. He was there. He hadn’t abandoned me to fate. And “I shall come forth as gold”! It was part of His plan for me, and so were and have been and will be those other times I cry, “Why me?” It often hurts, but He’s polishing me to be His treasure...

Why Me? A New PerspectiveChristina Fox2023-03-24T18:20:04+00:00

Seasons of the Soul

PATSY KUIPERS|GUEST Editor's Note: The following is an adapted excerpt from Patsy Kuiper's new book, Be Still: Quiet Moments with God in my Garden. For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven: a time to be born, and a time to die; a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted. Ecclesiastes 3:1-2 Nature’s Seasons I once attended a presentation where the speaker began with, “Summer, fall, and winter are seasons – spring is a miracle.” I’ve thought about her comment every spring since. Early warm spells begin to nudge plants from their slumber in January here in the South. Witchhazel, Lenten roses, and paperbush start the floral parade that continues for multiple weeks as plants take turns in the spotlight. Trees, flowers, baby birds – all embody the joyful message of rebirth, which in turn stimulates hope and rejuvenation in us. But spring gives way to summer, and tender ephemerals[1] disappear for another year as heat-loving specimens flourish. Summer annuals and perennials bloom, then set and disperse their seeds before beginning their decline. Fall arrives. Crops are ripe for harvest, the fruit of spring planting and summer tending. Soon daylight hours decrease, as does the temperature, and autumnal leaves create a riotous display of color – one last hurrah before they let go and blanket the ground for the winter. Ah, winter. Based on my observations, I’ve concluded it is the most misunderstood, under-appreciated season, at least from a gardening standpoint. Those unfamiliar with the ways of plants scan the leafless, apparently lifeless landscape and pronounce, “everything’s dead.” I used to think that too, but my horticulture studies dissuaded me from that notion. For instance, some seeds won’t germinate without scarification,[2] and some bulbs won’t bloom without adequate chill time. Many plants depend on the decreased daylight and increased darkness that accompany winter to flower at the appropriate time. My newfound knowledge has given me a different perspective...

Seasons of the SoulChristina Fox2022-05-04T23:01:02+00:00