MEGAN JUNG | GUEST

“We always thank God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, when we pray for you” Colossians 1:3).

For 20 years, I’ve heard the same refrain.

“I know I need to pray more…”

“I know I should be grateful, but…”

Regardless of location: my counseling office, a coffee shop on a college campus, or my seminary office, I have seen the exhausted, downcast, guilty expressions accompanying these words. I feel it too. I understand the tension about prayer and gratitude:

I know what I need to do, and I don’t know how.

Longing for gratitude and a robust prayer life is often coupled with frustration and uncertainty about how to change. Many of us feel like something stands between us, prayer, and gratitude. Some of us feel like we’re living a cosmic game of Tetris, trying to place spiritual disciplines between waking hours and a billion tasks. Not to mention a desperate need for rest. Some of us are embarrassed because we don’t feel like we have the right words. Others have pain, anger, or mistrust standing between us and the Lord. And if we’re honest, even the most mature Christians sometimes offer rote prayer and gratitude that feels boring and disengaged.

(If you find yourself bathed in the mercy of a consistent, rich, grateful prayer life, we praise the Lord for His goodness to you! Please share with others how the Lord has brought you to this place. Sister, we need your witness and encouragement.)

The Necessity of Prayer and Gratitude

Wherever you are in your relationship with gratitude and prayer, take a moment to read Colossians 1:1-14. Consider Paul’s demeanor as he writes to fellow believers (likely, strangers). He does not use shameful, finger-wagging imperatives about praying more or being thankful. Nor does he glibly check prayer and gratitude off of his to-do list. In this passage, our brother shows the necessity of prayer and gratitude for faithful, connected Christian living.

Paul did not sit in a comfy chair with hot tea and quietly pray next to a south-facing window. While this is a beautiful practice (keep your chair!), we see that Paul’s gratitude and prayer were not merely habits. Paul wrote while imprisoned. Let’s park there momentarily. Paul was chained to a Roman guard and under house arrest. Consider the physical, emotional, and spiritual discomfort of being chained to another person and prohibited from leaving a house that is not yours. I imagine I would feel bitter despair, and complaining, at best. Undoubtedly, at times, Paul anguished in desperation. But, Paul’s letter to the young church in Colossae begins not with petulance, but with praise and prayer. How does he do this?

He thanks God. He praises God for the salvation of his fellow-believers. He encourages other believers and he shares a prayer for their Christian maturity. He rehearses the truth of the Gospel: “He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son” (v. 13).

Reading his words, it is clear that Paul feasted on Truth and God’s work in order to persevere through suffering. Prayer and gratitude were his spiritual food. The Lord preserved Paul through prayer, reminders of His goodness, and Paul’s hunger for Kingdom growth. He maintained hope by connecting with other believers, praising God, and prayer.

Call Out to Your Father

How does this hit you? Are you tempted to minimize your own pain and shame yourself for not praying? Is it hard to be grateful because life feels bleak? Are you at a loss for words? Does it feel like God isn’t listening? Are you tempted to pull out your planner and create a rigorous schedule for summer quiet times? I certainly vacillate between all of those experiences.

And then I remember how I feel (in my good moments) when I hear my daughter’s squeals of delight or cries for help. Neither expression needs to be eloquent or timely or even accompanied by “Mom!” to grab my attention. She is mine. And so we are connected. My heart moves at the sound of her voice and so I move toward her. If I, a sinner, am moved by my daughter’s loud, feeble, and oftentimes inconvenient bids for connection, how much more does our Heavenly Father move when we call? Far more than I am my daughter’s keeper and provider, is the Lord to us. Paul shows us that calling on the Lord sustains us, like children are sustained as they call on their parents.

Likely, many of us will not experience house arrest like Paul. However, all of us will experience stuck-ness, adversity, and suffering. There is no magic prayer and gratitude app, habit or schedule that is one-size-fits-all. However, you have a Heavenly Father who LOVES to hear from you. He LOVES to be with you. He LOVES to keep and provide for you. He LOVES your honesty and delights in meeting you in your deepest need. Take a moment to tell Him what’s on your heart. Ask Him for the gift of nourishing prayer. Ask Him for the gift of wakefulness to goodness. Perhaps your prayer today will feel like a small child, looking up at her Father and barely uttering, “Help.” Perhaps your alarm will go off on your phone and remind you to pray for a friend who’s hurting. Perhaps you’ll use Paul’s words in Colossians to pray for a missionary you’ve never met. Or maybe you’ll walk by blooming peonies and, for a moment, be overcome with gratitude for the evidence of God’s goodness in every one of their exploding petals.

Like Paul, prayer and gratitude are our lifelines. Rather than pressuring yourself to cultivate a new habit, practice talking to Him like you are His daughter, because you are. Connectedness to Him will fuel your desire to connect with Him more. Lift your head up and to the right. He’s big and you’re at His side.

Photo by Gift Habeshaw on Unsplash