KENDRA KAMMER|GUEST

As I drove home from a women’s ministry meeting with a friend one evening, tears started running down my face. All my fears and frustrations burst forth in a torrent. I kept thinking: Does anyone think I can do this job? Am I going to get the hang of it? Why is it so much harder than when I served in women’s ministry previously?

As the new Women’s Discipleship Director at my church, I craved wisdom. Suddenly, I understood why Solomon asked for wisdom above all riches when he took on the leadership of Israel. In 1 Kings 3:7-9, Solomon said to God, “You have shown great and steadfast love to your servant Dad my father, because he walked before you in faithfulness, in righteousness, and in uprightness of heart toward you… And now, O Lord my God, you have made your servant king in place of David my father, although I am but a little child. I do not know how to go out or come in.” Solomon felt ill-equipped to fill his father’s shoes. His greatest concern was to be worthy of the great calling he had received.

Two years ago, God called me to be his faithful servant in a job that was too big for me. Since I had served in women’s ministry leadership for over twenty years, I thought the job would be an easy fit. But instead, God had a challenge for me. By the third month on the job, I was already burned out. A surprising (but not unexpected) gift came in the form of a two-week sickness, which slowed me down enough to reorient my priorities and recommit to my calling.

Grace, Grit, and Guardrails

To do this job faithfully, I needed to lean on God’s grace for me and others; to trust His sufficiency in me for this calling; and to find rest where I could, on guard against burnout.

Grace

“Behold, I give you a wise and discerning mind… I give you also what you have not asked…” (1 Kings 3:12-13)

When I first stepped into my leadership role, I tried to push through under the power of past lessons I learned from God. I eschewed my time with God in favor of ministry planning, emails, and meetings, and didn’t immediately realize the detrimental effects that was having. The Holy Spirit convicted me of that neglect, and since that day I have made it part of my daily routine to spend my first hour of work swimming in His means of grace—Scripture and prayer. In His goodness, God has given me a bounty of gifts of grace: confidence in Christ; conviction of sin; healing from past hurts; courage to boldly lead; and yes, even wisdom.

Through God’s grace I can also extend grace to others, considering Colossians 3:13: “Bearing with one another, and …forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive.”

Grit

“…and if you will walk in my ways, keeping my statutes and my commandments as your father David walked…” (1 Kings 3: 14)

I was unprepared for the pushback I encountered when I first stepped into this role. I naively expected the title to earn me respect, but instead many women came to me with long-harbored anger, hoping futilely that I could present their frustrations to the church leadership and resenting me when their expectations weren’t met.

Through these challenges, I have leaned heavily on the wisdom of 1 Thessalonians 5:14: “Admonish the unruly, encourage the faint-hearted, help the weak, be patient with everyone.”

I am thankful to my patient Father, who has taught me that people, though difficult at times, don’t get in the way of ministry—they are the ministry. Every encounter is a discipleship opportunity, and I must hold fast to the gospel.

Guardrails

“…then I will lengthen your days.” (1 Kings 3:14)

In his book Lead, Paul Tripp discusses the powerful imagery of “oaks of righteousness,” saying that God’s vision for His church is that many of its people would be steadfast, enduring in ministry and intimacy with God. This is a beautiful image that has captured my imagination. I hope to be a faithful oak of righteousness!

In order to pursue this goal, I need guardrails. First, I must diligently protect my work-life balance. I have learned to tell people, “I’ll be in touch to discuss this on Monday.” It is almost never an emergency.

Another guardrail is to rely on my allies, the people who are fighting alongside me. They are the ones who pull me up when I’ve fallen in a pit, or who sit and listen when I feel like staying there. They remind me that “I am steadfast” (Psalm 57:7). I have found my allies at my church and at conferences offered by the PCA, such as LT. Come to the conferences offered by the PCA and find your allies!

Finally, I sought resources to invigorate my heart when I grow weary. My favorites are:

You’re Only Human by Kelly M. Kapic
Running on Empty by Barbara Bancroft
Tempered Resilience by Tod Bolsinger

Stepping into leadership has been a surprising journey of challenges and growth. By relying on God’s grace, finding the grit to persevere, and establishing guardrails to protect my heart, I’m learning to navigate this calling. If you’ve been called to serve in women’s ministry, know that I am praying for you. My prayer is that you will thrive in God’s grace, stand firm in His strength, and endure for the long haul.

Photo by Alexis Brown on Unsplash