Suffering

God’s Faithful Sovereignty When Things Don’t go as Planned

HANNAH HAGARTY | GUEST My husband and I have two failed adoptions, chronic illness, and an unexpected mission field exodus to our names. Things not going as planned? I may be an unwilling expert on the subject. But it turns out, being an expert on disappointment can mean possessing a deep appreciation for the goodness of God’s sovereignty. We readily said yes when asked to adopt the two little sisters in our home. As foster parents for nearly half of our married lives, Mali had come to us at eighteen months old. When her sister Ziva was born, we picked her up from the hospital. Birthdays and holidays flew by with our biological children and the little girls until they had been with us nearly two years. And then, with one phone call, we were told the case plan had changed from adoption to reunification. The girls were to be handed over to a biological relative investigated for crimes against a child. It didn’t matter which way anyone turned that fact about - sense was found nowhere in it. Years later, my husband and I and seven of our children were living in West Asia, sent out by the church to do mission work, never intending to live in the States again. For thirteen months, we worked our assigned jobs, learned the culture, and did the difficult work of progressing in the local language. Our kids flourished. And then, with another phone call, devastating news from the States immediately put me on the thirty-one hour flight back....

God’s Faithful Sovereignty When Things Don’t go as PlannedChristina Fox2026-02-27T20:54:52+00:00

Weak at Work: How God Supplies Our Strength

JENNIFER WHITE |GUEST Editor’s Note: this article contains stories of infancy and pregnancy loss. My husband, a newly elected church elder, put the car in park. We locked eyes. “Wait,” I said. “Before we go in, let’s think through what we are going to say.” We agreed to tell the young couple that we loved them. We wanted to remind them of God’s great love for them. We planned to pray and offer various resources available through our church. As we entered the hospital room, we both froze. The mom sat in bed quietly crying. The teary father held their baby boy wrapped in a crinkly cooling blanket, protecting his body and skin so his siblings could meet him. He had died unexpectedly the day before in an emergency c-section. As we looked in the parents’ eyes, we crumbled, grieving and crying with this family. We prayed the truths of God’s word over their lives: that He is near to the brokenhearted, that He loves little children, that He is our shepherd and our rock. Even in the newness of grief and shock of pain, they rehearsed God’s truths along with us. Then, we left them to hold their baby boy, to grieve and cry together. As we exited, I felt overwhelmed and helpless. “Lord,” I prayed, “are you sure? Am I the right person for this job? Was I capable or strong enough? Did we say the right things? Did we stay long enough? Too long? Did our visit make things easier or harder for these grieving parents?” When We Are Inadequate This hospital visit happened during my third week serving as Women’s Ministry Director at my church....

Weak at Work: How God Supplies Our StrengthChristina Fox2026-02-27T20:49:31+00:00

When You Want to Trade in Your Specific Clay-Like Conditions

ELLEN DYKAS | CONTRIBUTOR But we have this treasure in jars of clay, to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us. (2 Corinthians 4:7) I recently told a friend that I’m willing to participate in the sufferings of Christ; but can it be on my terms and in the form, timing, and intensity of my choosing?! I see the irony and hypocrisy of such a statement yet the truth is, it’s how I feel and think sometimes, even if unconsciously. Maybe like me, you delight in being a clay jar filled with the treasure of Jesus, yet struggle when the clay feels extra fragile, sad, or worn out. In those conditions, I can be tempted to want to click a ‘return’ button as simply as it is to send back an unwanted Amazon package. In the past few years, certain aspects of my clay-ness have felt extra hard. The impact of menopause on my body and ongoing disrupted sleep. Health related anxiety and the physiological, emotional, and spiritual impact of that. I transitioned into a (mostly) full time equipping and content development role which has been truly such a gift to have a dedicated season to pour out what I’ve learned in the years I’ve served with Harvest USA. Yet, it’s also been unexpectedly lonely, as I’ve been at my desk more than face to face with women as I was for my first sixteen years. What’s a girl to do?...

When You Want to Trade in Your Specific Clay-Like ConditionsChristina Fox2026-02-15T14:32:53+00:00

A Testimony in Sorrow

JENNA BOGARD | GUEST As my dear pastor neared the end of his life in 2022, I wept by his hospital bed. All I could utter was, “Jim, you are going to be with Christ soon!” His face lit up; that was all he wanted. His intimacy with Christ was apparent to everyone who knew him. Prior to his death, he repeatedly urged me to dive into the Song of Solomon as it ministered to him greatly in his last few months of suffering with ALS. At the time, I dismissed his claim that the book had anything to do with Christ and the church and even teased him for holding such beliefs. I wish he was still here so I could humbly admit my error and thank him for pointing me to some of the most beautiful truths of Christ that I’ve only begun to uncover. A Reflection of the Heart Dr. David Murray’s exposition of Song of Solomon chapter five was particularly impactful as it so perfectly described my spiritual condition at the time: utterly weak, fearful, depressed, and desperate.[i] As the chapter opens, the groom is at the door, calling the bride to open the door (v. 2). However, the bride is apathetic to his call. “I had put off my garment; how could I put it on? I had bathed my feet; how could I soil them?” (v.3) The bride didn’t want to put in the effort, a situation we usually find ourselves in when we have temporarily satisfied ourselves with the lust of our idols...

A Testimony in SorrowChristina Fox2026-02-14T18:25:24+00:00

The Call to Remember

LINDSAY FUNCHES | GUEST Apart from the two times when I actually forgot my children, the worst episode of mother forgetfulness in my life occurred in Atlanta, Georgia, when I had four children under the age of six. Having just moved to the area, we had been attending our new church for two months. Mary Boyde was five, Sam was three, Steele was nineteen months old, and Hayley was two months old. Steele had Crouzon Syndrome, a craniofacial syndrome like the boy in the movie Wonder, serious medical issues, and literally a dozen doctors. He wasn’t sleeping at night because of severe sleep apnea. Needless to say, I was exhausted as Christmas approached. As is often the case, our new church performed a magnificent Christmas pageant every year with the Sunday School children. Oddly enough, they held this Christmas pageant during the Sunday School hour...

The Call to RememberChristina Fox2025-12-12T12:00:54+00:00

Singing Through Christmas in Minor and Major Keys

JOANNA HODGES|GUEST ‘Tis the season of bright and glimmering baubles, loud and busy parties, and exuberant and merry music. As we prepare for Christmas, we eagerly anticipate singing our favorite festive songs around the piano. Through well-known happy tunes in a major key, we proclaim “Joy to the World” because Christ came to crush the head of the serpent. We gather our friends to sing “O Come All Ye Faithful” and can’t wait to hear our kids shout “We Wish You a Merry Christmas” in the church program. Yet the more holidays God gives us in this broken world, the more we realize that every Christmas season rightfully includes not only the triumphal tone of major keys, but also the wistful waiting and somber tone of the carols in a minor key. A Partial Celebration Even though the Savior accomplished His earthly mission and sits at the Father’s right hand to reign in victory, those nagging foes of the world, the flesh, and the devil still assault us here on earth. They don’t take a vacation during Christmas, and often it seems they rear their ugly heads even more intensely this time of year. Our hearts may be filled with awe and wonder as we read our Advent devotional in the morning, yet by the afternoon we are overwhelmed by the Christmas day menu, family dynamics around the holiday table, and the jam-packed calendar of parties. We scroll through Facebook’s Time Hop pictures of past Christmas gatherings and realize how much our own bodies and those of our loved ones have been marred by disease, dysfunction, and death over the years. Sometimes it’s not easy to take a deep breath and sing “Hark! The Herald Angels Sing” with smiles on our faces when the sadness of a sin-cursed existence makes us want to silence our voices and quietly mourn....

Singing Through Christmas in Minor and Major KeysChristina Fox2025-11-28T15:39:14+00:00

Our Joy is Not in the Trials, but in Him

MARYBETH MCGEE | GUEST Recently, my own words echoed in my head: “Our joy is not found in the trials, but in Him.” Those words—from an article I wrote here last Advent—were suddenly tested in a trial unlike any we weathered before. On May 22, 2025, our home erupted in chaos on the first morning of summer break. My middle son and I discovered that my oldest son had passed away—unexpectedly, quietly, without any warning. At just fourteen, he was gone, and there was nothing we could do. Years of waiting and praying for this child—and his brothers—felt ripped away in an instant. Powerless. Crushed. Broken. Even as I spoke with emergency services, I felt the battle for my soul begin. Shock, fear, anger, and a grief beyond words swirled inside me as I heard the familiar whisper echo from Genesis 3: “Did God really say?” Peter’s words became more real than ever—there truly is an enemy who prowls like a lion, seeking to devour (1 Peter 5:8). I knew this would be a test of my faith. Our family was being called to the front lines of spiritual warfare, and we needed reinforcements. My second call, just minutes later, was to my pastor. Like any good shepherd, he rushed to our home and stepped straight into the chaos. My husband was an hour away at work; our house filled with firefighters, paramedics, and sheriffs—faces my children had rarely seen outside of children’s shows, let alone in our front yard. Over the next several days and weeks, our home was a constant flow of people, tears, laughter, joy, and deep mourning. The circumstances were devastating, but something different was happening. Trials, both great and small, tend to stir up thoughts about gratitude—or the lack thereof. We can’t talk about gratitude without acknowledging the tension between our expectations and our circumstances. If anyone ever had an excuse to skip gratitude during a trial, the loss of a child would seem like a good one. But do we really get a pass because life feels unbearable? As you might guess, my answer is no...

Our Joy is Not in the Trials, but in HimChristina Fox2025-11-22T18:37:42+00:00

Discipling Children in Suffering

AMY SANTARELLI |GUEST When my children were young, my husband and I worked hard to prepare them for life. We taught them skills they needed such as tying their shoes, doing laundry, driving, and choosing a career. We also taught them Bible stories, character lessons, and how to obey. But how to suffer? Mostly, we tried to help them avoid it. Now I am a biblical counselor who sits with people who are enduring a wide range of suffering. Seeing their struggles, I find myself looking back at this aspect of our child rearing and wishing I could have a parenting do-over. In our efforts to raise our children well and prepare them for life, we missed something important—purposefully preparing them for a world where the Bible says we will have trouble (John 16:33; James 1:2; I Pet. 4:12–13). How do we equip our children to biblically respond to life’s troubles, so they do not flounder, or worse, run away from God to false comforts? When trouble hits, practice lament and submission to God with your children....

Discipling Children in SufferingChristina Fox2025-07-11T15:04:24+00:00

Grief and Lament in Texas: Weeping with Hope

MARISSA BONDURANT | CONTRIBUTOR A cloud of collective grief hovers over Texas. For days after the flood, there was an actual dark cloud over all central Texas as the whole of creation groaned together in the pains of grief and longing (Rom. 8:22). A suppressive force of humidity mixed with shock and stirred with sorrow made it hard to breathe, sleep, or even make basic decisions. Although the headlines focus on the heartache in Texas, I know that this grief is seeping much farther from here. So many of the people who died were visiting from all over the country. Little girls at summer camp. Families camping under majestic cypress trees. Grandparents bunked up with grandchildren to make precious memories over the holiday. And now, thousands of people across the country grieve the loss of loved ones, co-workers, classmates, teammates, neighbors, and friends. Living in San Antonio, the Guadalupe River is considered our backyard play place. Everyone I know is only 1 or 2 degrees away from the devastation. My church alone had three girls at Camp Mystic the day the water rose. A dear friend of ours is on the ground doing recovery work. He’s got a military, warzone, ER doctor background, and he said he’s never seen anything like this. As of the writing this, they expect close to 300 image bearers to eventually be found in the debris. And in this deep, collective grief, we need the Church. We need you....

Grief and Lament in Texas: Weeping with HopeChristina Fox2025-07-11T19:04:12+00:00

The Stewardship of Suffering

AMY SHORE | GUEST Winter crept into my heart early this past year. Weariness gave way to selfish wallowing and introspection as I reflected on hard realities during the holiday season. December 31st, I found myself unable to breathe. A beautiful sand dollar, a Christmas gift from a friend, lay shattered on the kitchen floor. I fell to my knees in despair alongside this visual representation of my current brokenness. January 1st, a morning filled with missed calls and urgent messages: my dad had suffered a heart attack and was undergoing surgery. Then came January 21st when I faced the devastating reality of his death. I couldn’t catch my breath. The Learning Journey “Learning to live in the reality of His presence is the essence of our prayers and our pilgrimage.”[1] For the past year and a half, well before my father passed, I’ve been chewing on that quote from Susan Hunt around the journey to know God better amidst fear and frailty. I long to live more fully in that reality. You may have heard the saying, “God never gives us more than we can handle.” My pride wants this to be true because it means I can pull myself up by my own bootstraps. I’ve tried. My bootstraps snapped....

The Stewardship of SufferingChristina Fox2025-06-21T19:25:35+00:00